Assassin's Creed Meme
by Griffin of the Gates
Summary: I saw Blue's and I just had to try writing it too. Hope you enjoy.


**Author's Note: Okay, sooo I'm not that great at drawing (I make beginners look like masters) but I keep seeing these Meme's on DeviantArt and I always want to answer them but alas fail at drawing anything that conveys my true detail. Then I ran across TheBlueFoxtrot A Samba's written version of Mazzaroo's Assassin's Creed Meme and I decided that writing my answers out would satisfy my creativity. **

**Hope you enjoy! XD**

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1. **Who are you and where do your loyalties lie? Templar of Assassin?**

"Can't there be a third choice?" a timid voice asks the shadows.

The small blade bites against the young girl's throat. Blue eyes shine with fear as she watches the white clad assassin pull closer. His brown eyes are distracted by the Templar behind her, but he keeps his blade against her skin.

"There is no other choice!" he hisses.

The teen picks at the lint on her hoodie, nervous. The Templar's sword is pricking through the fabric behind her, but she is more worried about Altair.

"I'm just a poor miserable student…I don't have time for assassin's and Templars. My name is Wigweed for pity's sake!" she snaps, forcing her voice not to shake.

The assassin's blade slides gently against Wigweed's throat, a small line of crimson forming there. The Templar pulls back, prepared to strike.

"Speak sorceress!" the Templar yells.

There is a faint clink of metal against stone as the Templar raises his sword. In a sudden move of desperation, Wigweed cries out, "Alright, alright…I'm an assassin!"

Altair grabs the front of the girl's jacket, slinging her to the side as he impales the attacking Templar with his hidden blade.

2. **Who's your favorite character and why? Draw them shirtless XD**

Malik stands at the edge of the riverbank, staring at the rocks in bewilderment. He could have sworn he had left his clothes hanging on the largest one. Now they were gone and he was starting to get cold. The Dai cursed himself. He knew he should have never left his belongings unguarded. No doubt Altair had convinced some foolish Novice to take and hide the clothing.

He swept the surrounding area with a sharp gaze. His weapons too were gone. There was no way he would go chasing after the culprit with nothing on. That would be what Altair was waiting for.

"Would you please hold still?"

The assassin spun his head, suddenly aware of the feeling that someone was watching him. A young girl with straw blonde hair cut into a short, boyish style was staring at him with determined blue eyes. Beside her lay all his belongings in a neat pile. In her arms, she held a book and some strange writing device.

"Ummm…Who are you?"

"Wigweed," the girl answered, returning to her drawing.

Malik stared before getting up the courage to demand his clothes back.

"Not until I'm finished," she answered, not looking back up at him.

He waited, curious. Finally, she stood up and walked towards him, holding out his clothes with a bright smile.

"They told me to draw my favorite shirtless, I couldn't resist the opportunity," she teased him.

Malik caught a glimpse of the 'drawing' and cocked his head to the side. "Why do I look like an inkpot vomited on a piece of paper?"

Red flooded into Wigweed's cheeks and she put all her strength into pushing the Dai back. The man, trying to dress himself, was unbalanced and fell backwards into the water, all his clothes now soaking wet. When he surfaced, the girl was glaring.

"Not even your awesome sarcasm and emotional backstory can save you from an artist's crushed pride!" she yelled.

3. **Got any fan characters? Introduce them. (No own characters? Draw an Assassin's Creed Dance Party! Go nuts lol)**

Wigweed stands to the far right of a stage and she smiles as she tugs on the golden rope to her left. The curtain rises to reveal a 5' 4" young woman wearing the white robes of the Assassin's Order. The assassin is wearing a gray hood and the bottom half of her face is hidden behind a sand colored scarf. "This is Kalila A-Sayf," Wigweed announces proudly. "She is the twin sister of Kadar (And Malik's younger sister, duh!). She hates people seeing her face because she thinks they can see her soul. Let's see what else….oh she's extremely protective and likes pulling pranks on Altair and Malik. And she doesn't want to admit it, but she has a major crush on Altair…,"

"I do not!"

Kalila is now glaring at her creator with angry blue eyes. She activates her hidden blade with a metallic clink. Wigweed's face pales. "No, I'm pretty sure that you kiss him sometime in the story,"

The assassin growls and runs towards the other woman menacingly. "That _Novice_ got my brother killed!" she cries.

Wigweed backs away a few steps before running off the stage and out the Emergency exits yelling back fearfully, "But…Kadar's not dead!"

4. **What would happen if your character/s met Altair or/and Ezio? (No characters? Draw yourself instead.)**

"Can I rub your chin?"

Ezio stares at the masked assassin with incredulous eyes before consenting. Kalila exclaims with glee, using her left hand to stroke the gentle hairs on the older man's chin.

"You're really sensitive," she observes as he shivers each time to strokes him. Red starts to appear in Ezio's cheeks. If the young woman is bothered by this, she doesn't show it. Of course, he can't see anything behind the blasted scarf.

Behind them Altair is standing with Malik who has a smug grin on his face. Altair looks upset as he grumbles, arms crossed over his chest. Malik laughs.

"Jealous, Brother?"

Altair says nothing. Malik laughs. "I don't know why. All you do is throw her off of buildings and leave her to rot in Templar prisons. And he's obviously much more charming than you, even Kalila can't resist him and he's only said two words,"

At this, the woman looks over her shoulder, the wrinkles on her forehead signaling her anger. Her hidden blade is facing their direction in an obscene gesture.

"Shut. Up."

5. **Le gasp! You've been sucked into a wormhole and blasted into 1191 A.D. What are you doing? **

Malik sees the blur of motion moving past him again. This is his last chance he realizes. He snatches at the air and hears a cry of indignation. The one-armed man smiles weakly when he realizes that he's caught his prey.

Wigweed tries valiantly to wriggle free from the assassin's grip. She is dressed in clothing that Malik does not recognize. He doesn't even know who the girl is and he is still upset about the clothing thief fiasco. Nevertheless, he is worried for the child's mental health.

"Please! One more time Malik?"

The Dai stares at Wigweed with amazement in his eyes. "You've jumped off this viewpoint thirty times!" he cries, "Are you not tired, child?"

The girl grins as she unzips her hoodie and slips away. "Never!"

Malik stares helplessly as she runs to the edge of the wooden post and jumps.

"Weeeeeee!"

6. **Oh noes! You have been captured by Templars! How do you plan to escape from Abstergo?**

"Can I have some ice cream? No. Okay. Did you know that Desmond is a girl? You should see your face, I'm just kidding. So how about that ice cream….Blah blah blah….Ice cream now…More random foolish annoying dialogue that no one cares about…Can I PLEASE have some ice cream now…How about now? Ice cream….Ice cream…..LALALALA I WANT ICE CREAM!"

Some random frazzled guard thrusts a $20 into her hands and shoves her out the front door.

"Go get some damn ice cream and come back!"

Wigweed smiles brightly and runs off, sliding the money into her pocket. "Suckers!"

7.** Obligatory shipping question! Do you have a favorite ship?**

Rebecca and Shaun – 'Nuff said.

8. **Draw**(Write)** the crackiest pairing you can think of**

The two blondes stare at each other with bewilderment written all over their faces. Sibrand clenches tightly to the sword as he strokes it across the other man's chest.

"Who are you?" he asks, his guttural Germanic accent flowing smoothly from his lips.

Shaun's eyes light up with a strange glint. The corners of the British man's mouth pull up into a weak smile, oblivious to the threatening blade in front of him.

"I swore I would never ask this of anyone, but…," he began, nervously causing Sibrand to tilt his head at the sound of the English accent, "Can you say more? I love your accent!"

9. **ROFL! You know what else is fun? Crossovers! Do a crossover…of DOOM!**

"Now roll your shoulders like this,"

Altair tries to follow the orders of the man beside him but becomes distracted by the blue haired man teaching him. He fails once more and Oblio softly corrects him. Altair sighs, toying with his blade.

"Might I inquire about something?" he finally asks, eyes glaring at the dancing man. He can only wonder how he can move his hips in such a funny way without concern.

Oblio grins crookedly as he sways his hips.

"Sure,"

Altair waves a hand towards the man's lower section as he asks.

"Where the hell is your butt?"

(Assassin's Creed and Dance Central. If you've ever played as Oblio, the blue-haired guy, you'll realize in his original outfit of skinny jeans it seems like he has no butt at ALL!)

10. **All done. Now tag someone else.**

Wigweed shakes her head defiantly. "I refuse!"

Kalila appears from nowhere and unsheathes her sword, stepping towards the other female menacingly.

Wigweed gulps. "I tag everybody! Please don't hurt me!"


End file.
